Spiritual Love Warrior

The Bible refers to the importance of waking up early in the morning to seek God’s presence (Psalm 63:1, Mark 1:35). It is also believed that Jesus was born during the third watch of the night, which is between 3 am and 6 am.My Story

I had a cat, his name was Sampson. He would have been 19 on May 5th.

Just before New Years eve, between midnight and 8am, his right eye became filled with blood. He had stage 2 kidney disease which I thought was a contributing factor.

On Tuesday following, when his veterinarian opened, I called their office and brought him in. His eye pressure was a 10, blood pressure was good, and lab results showed no issues with his thyroid. His weight was in a steady decrease already, but overall healthy. I was given a steroid to put in his eye and bring down the swelling, and that he needed to see an ophthalmologist to determine what is happening. A few days later, this past Wednesday, I made the appointment for him.

On Thursday, week 3, his left eye was now filled with blood and he has been sleeping most of the time for the past few days. I made calls the next day, Friday, to his vet and they tried to get my cat seen by a specialist at a different location. The specialist looked over his records, and after speaking with me, said she could squeeze him in on February 5th, despite what I told her.

Well… this calmed me down until this past Saturday evening. I KNEW something was wrong and prayed to God for guidance.

At 11pm, his guidance came. I called the first specialist location to see if they can look at him and give him some pain medication. Long story short, within 10 days, his medical issue has grown, and he developed new ones. Both eyes needed removing, cancer/tumor issues raised along with a heart murmur. He had confusion and walking into things, not eating, sleeping consistently, rapid weight loss, stage 2 kidney disease, life long urinary tract issue, and loss of bladder control.

While I waited to hear back from the Doctor, I was in a small treatment room and felt a presence walk up to me. I looked over and didn’t see anyone, but I knew. I asked Jesus to take the wheel when I asked for his guidance and help a few hours before. I wasn’t alone.

Right before 3 am, after a conversation with the emergency hospital doctor, the best option for him was euthanasia due to his growing medical issues spreading quickly.

I was brought to a room to say goodbye and hold him. While I was holding Sampson, trying to say my goodbye, he was looking around the room like he was seeing something, or somethings. For pet owners, you know the difference between looking around of curiousity and seeing something. He was seeing something. He didn’t want to be in my arms. I don’t blame him, as I was a sobbing mess, and this put me over the edge. My heart shattered at this point and I knew it was stressing my little guy. I clicked on the call button and the nurse came and had to calm me down so I wouldn’t pass out from lack of oxygen. I wasn’t strong enough for this. When I handed Sampson off to the technician, he calmed down, so you can imagine my guilt the next few days over my weekness. My torn to shreds heart which wasn’t strong enough to be with him until his last breath. Devistation and bereivement of not being with him in this lifetime has taken over. 

Don’t get me wrong, I knew that this was the right thing. I didn’t want him to be in this much pain any more. Putting him through surgery, more medicine and lengthy treatment just to prolong the inevitable, would have been for me. Not him.

“The LORD is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.”

Psalm 34:89

When I calmed down a few days later, I then realized, what Sampson must have been seeing. The Lord sent someone or someones to bring my fur-baby home. 

Jesus did what he does, by offering me peace and comfort during this time.

I believe Heavenly beings were there, ready to great him and guide him. I am grateful for that. I looked at the clock, and it was just past 3am.

3 am. Looking at the clock, that was HIS answer to me when I asked him for guidance. It was his way of telling me that this was the right choice, and he was bringing my little guy home.

3 am. This was when Jesus took control for me. He guided me and made sure I was not alone.

3 am. This is when I had to say goodbye, for now, to my emotional support companion, my fur baby, my best friend, my everything.

3 am. This was the point when I knew for certain HE is with me, and my faith grew stronger. Jesus carried me through this past 12 hours because he loves me.

Jesus loves us all, and when we ask him to carry us through a very difficult time, he will. If you ask him to take the wheel through a challenging time, he will.

Have a blessed day my brothers and sisters in Christ.